"Tales Of An Imposter"

It was an odd feeling to arrive in New York City with three bags, and a lot of hope that I could find something to put all my energy into.  Due to tragedies in life, I had a history of just going for it with no fear of the outcome.  I didn't know anyone in the city and it was spring and I moved into my new apartment in Chelsea.  My favorite thing about the city is just wandering around at night, downtown through the West Village to Soho and to my favorite, Cafe Gitane.  

I was in over my head, there were lots of successful, smart looking people hanging out and beautiful girls. I didn't really socialize much as I didn't want to tell anyone what I was up to in the city because then I would have to explain what I was up to and I didn't exactly know my plan.  I had gotten a few acting jobs in New Orleans and just like that, auditioned at Stella Adler and got in.  It was something to do and a place to land in the big city.  

I wandered around a lot and dreamed and read books for weeks without talking to many people and really didn't mind.  When school started it got easier and began meeting people and dating and all that.  It was very inspiring in those studios, over looking the city.  I was reinventing myself yet again and I've always been comfortable doing that.  Though I was comfortable, I did feel like an imposter.  I guess you have to be an imposter for a while until you figure out a path.  And then the great acting teachers began to look at me as if I had the greatest potential to reach the heights of former students like Brando or Pacino.  It was a good feeling to be seen as an artist by these older artists I admired.  It gave me wings actually to quit the school and buy more equipment and set out to make my first record.

Years later, when I'm on the 27th floor of Atlantic Records signing my first record deal, the feeling was still there.  As if to say, wow these folks are buying this, they believe me!  It's an odd thing really and no one talks about it.  The journey and finding ones place in the world.  I'm telling you this because maybe you see me as a musician, an artist and that it must have always been.  I tell you, it wasn't.  One must stand up and be brave and take the first step down strange paths.  There I said it.  You got this.  

I wonder what's inside you.